[Image above] Credit: Chris Pirillo; Flickr CC BY-NC-ND 2.0 

For centuries, men and women alike have desired to have a unibrow like that of their distant cave dwelling ancestors. Now, thanks to ceramic fiber technology, this dream can be realized.

CeramiBrow of Bogusville, R.I., has announced a new line of ceramic fibers that can be used for unibrow transplants. The ceramic line includes silicon carbide and silicon nitride fibers for brown and black hair and zirconia for blonde hair. Redheads are out of luck.

“We are proud and thrilled that we can make such a wonderful contribution to mankind,” says marketing manager Thomas Kinkade of CeramiBrow. “We can make the world a more attractive place thanks to these revolutionary ceramic fibers. In addition, these transplants will increase the self esteem of many brow-challenged men and women across the world.”

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Mary-Jo is happy with her ceramic fiber unibrow transplant. Credit: Canon in 2D; Flickr CC BY 2.0

Timothy Smegal will be presenting the latest research efforts, including the results of the first successful unibrow transplant on a lab mouse, at MS&T15, October 4–8, Columbus, Ohio. 

In-vivo studies have confirmed what researchers theorized—living tissue will accept the ceramic fibers. In the study, the subcutaneous, dermal, and epidermal layers of the skin did not reject the fiber or show any signs of infection. The fibers are completely safe as long as they are not pulled with tweezers and inhaled. Additional studies are underway to see if the ceramic fiber implants could be used for other areas of the body.

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Lab mice also were pretty happy with the results. Credit: Mycroyance; Flickr CC BY-NC 2.0

Happy April Fools Day! For more foolishness, catch a few new elemental jokes in this short video, courtesy of the American Chemical Society.

Credit: Reactions; Youtube